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Politics

Can Trump Follow Through On His Campaign Promises?

President-elect Donald Trump made a variety of lofty promises during his campaign as part of a pledge to “make America great again.” The Onion looks at several of these promises and evaluates whether Trump will be willing or able to follow through on them.

What You Need To Know About The Dakota Access Pipeline

Construction is currently stalled on the Dakota Access Pipeline, which would connect North Dakota’s Bakken Shale development to oil tank farms in Illinois, by protests led by members of the Standing Rock Sioux tribe. The Onion provides answers to key questions about the project.

What Can Americans Expect Under A Trump Presidency?

With two months until the inauguration of Donald Trump, many Americans are wondering what his term will look like and what his administration might accomplish. The Onion answers some common questions about Trump’s upcoming presidency

James Comey Quickly Reopens Clinton Email Investigation For Few More Minutes

‘Nope, Looks Like It’s All Good Here,’ Says FBI Director

WASHINGTON—In a letter addressed to Congress that was quickly followed by a second message retracting the first, FBI director James Comey is said to have briefly reopened the investigation into Hillary Clinton’s emails for several more minutes Friday.

Pollsters Admit They Underestimated Voters’ Adrenal Glands

WASHINGTON—In response to widespread criticism that they had failed to predict Donald Trump’s victory in the 2016 election, analysts from polling organizations around the nation admitted Thursday they had underestimated the influence of voters’ adrenal glands on the presidential race.
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Clinton And The Fugitive Financier

Congress is investigating Bill Clinton's pardon of Marc Rich, a major Democratic Party contributor who since 1983 has been living in Switzerland to avoid trial for racketeering, tax evasion, and trading with Iran. What do you think?
  • "A powerful politician doing favors for a corrupt business crony? America has lost its innocence."

    Hugh Carter Math Teacher
  • "Would you do any less for a loved one or major campaign contributor?"

    Patrick Poulon Systems Analyst
  • "Marc Rich's plight is a lot like that of Native American activist Leonard Peltier, except Rich has eleventy gazillion dollars and isn't in jail."

    Jessica Smith Graduate Student
  • "I'm sure living a luxurious lifestyle in Switzerland for the past 18 years showed Rich the error of his ways."

    Harriet Swann Guidance Counselor
  • "Come on, let him go. The poor guy's done his time. He was president for eight years, for God's sake."

    Marc Cowart Electrician
  • "I wish Clinton could have pardoned my ass out of jail for robbing that camera store. Oh, and also for my oil deals with Iran."

    Henry Thalacker Custodian

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