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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.
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Coffee May Prolong Life

Recent studies have showed that coffee drinkers are likely to live longer than non-coffee-drinkers, regardless of whether their beverage of choice is regular or decaf. What do you think?

  • “Yeah, but coffee drinkers are also more alert and productive, so there’s a trade-off.”

    Dan Udy Screen-Machine Operator
  • “The study neglected to mention that hazelnut blend will make the last few years of your life unbearable.”

    Fiona Stein Unemployed
  • “I’m so sick of scientists telling us that everything we thought was bad for us is actually good for us. Isn’t there any way to destroy your body anymore?”

    Lou Kovacs Dowel Pointer
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