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Commemorating Reagan's 100th

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Lone Superdelegate Voting For Martin O’Malley Feels Like Total Fucking Idiot

PHILADELPHIA—Sheepishly raising his hand to nominate the man who suspended his presidential campaign back in February, unpledged delegate Bob Shiefke told reporters Tuesday he felt like a “total fucking idiot” for being the only person at the Democratic National Convention voting for former Maryland governor Martin O’Malley.

Michelle Obama: ‘Well, There Are 8 Years Of My Life I’ll Never Get Back’

PHILADELPHIA—Her face fixed in an expression of apathetic detachment as she took the stage Monday night to raucous cheers and applause, First Lady Michelle Obama reportedly began her address to the Democratic National Convention by exhaling audibly and remarking that she would never get the past eight years of her life back.

Revelations From The DNC Email Leak

Last week, WikiLeaks posted 20,000 email exchanges among DNC officials, the content of which led to DNC chair Debbie Wasserman Schultz’s resignation on the eve of the convention. Here are some of the key revelations from the leak

CNN Producer On Hunt For Saddest-Looking Fuck With Convention Button Collection

PHILADELPHIA—Weaving his way through the crowd of patriotically dressed attendees excitedly milling around on the floor of the Democratic National Convention, CNN segment producer Jeff Raskin reportedly went on the hunt Monday for the most pitiful-looking fuck willing to speak on camera about their political button collection.
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Commemorating Reagan's 100th

Sunday marked the 100th birthday of the late President Ronald Wilson Reagan. How did you remember him?

  • "I thought it would be a nice gesture to set aside my personal prejudices for the day and sell a shit ton of weapons to some Iranian dude."

    Adam Rubenstein Arms Dealer
  • "I spent exorbitant sums of money I didn't have but then convinced my family how important it is to live within our means."

    Ceecee Bryan Budget Officer
  • "I'm really too young to remember much about Ronald Reagan, but I haven't let that stop me from elevating him to Messiah-like status."

    Lawrence Bakija Student

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