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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
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Company To Offer Balloon Rides To Edge Of Space

An Arizona-based company called World View Enterprises says it will offer rides to the edge of space in a capsule carried by a helium balloon at a price of $75,000 per person. What do you think?

  • “I would be freaking out until I reminded myself that the safest form of travel is helium balloon rides.”

    Kirk Otero Light Bulb Tester
  • “Is the balloon normal or Garfield-shaped?”

    Bennie Kopp Stained Glass Glazier
  • “But what if the balloon pops? Some sweet animal will try to eat it and choke to death.”

    Erin Lafferty Hydrometer Calibrator

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