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Nation's Hardass Cops Finally Find Time To Play Games

In a sudden departure from their long-held stance of not being here to play games and not, in fact, having the time to play games, the nation’s hardass cops announced Wednesday they had finally carved out a couple hours during which games could be p...

How Movies Receive Their Ratings

Many Americans use the MPAA’s formalized rating system as a guide for which films to see. The Onion provides a step-by-step view into how these ratings are chosen:

‘Winnie-The-Pooh’ Turns 90

Winnie-The-Pooh, the A.A. Milne series featuring a stuffed bear and his toy animal friends, debuted 90 years ago this week. Here are some milestones from the franchise’s nearly century-long run:
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Conan May Leave 'Tonight'

Saying that he doesn't want to take part in the destruction of the Tonight Show legacy, Conan O'Brien announced he will step down from the program he began hosting eight months ago if NBC moves it to a later time slot. What do you think?
  • "Simon Cowell's leaving, Conan's leaving. TV is in a lot of trouble. I mean, where are they going to find people who want to be on it?"

    Paul Thicke Police Officer
  • "I'm with NBC president Jeff Zucker. Faced with a struggling network, some might have gone with a long-term solution of cultivating talent and developing groundbreaking programming, but Zucker found a quick and superficial answer that involved a shockingly small amount of thought and effort. Bravo."

    Harry Chase Punch Press Operator
  • "Is this guy a saint or something? Who turns down an opportunity to be unfair to Jimmy Fallon?"

    LeAnn Johnson Receptionist

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