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Conan’s 'Tonight' Debut

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Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
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Ugh, This A Place Where Bartenders Wear Bow Tie

PITTSBURGH—Saying they should have known from the moment they walked in the unmarked speakeasy entrance and spotted the extensive wood paneling, customers confirmed Friday that, ugh, this is one of those places where the bartenders all wear bow ties.

Conan’s 'Tonight' Debut

Former Late Night host Conan O'Brien took over helming duties of the venerable Tonight Show from Jay Leno last night. What do you think?
  • "I'm not allowed to stay up to watch The Tonight Show. Yes, my parents are dead now, but I felt obligated to continue the tradition."

    Ritchie Scharffenburger Automotive Undercoater
  • "I'm happy about the potential of seeing a Masturbating Bear segment following a George Gobel clip on the Tonight Show 60th Anniversary special."

    Debbie Kaufman Nitroglycerine Distributor
  • "Wait, who are they going to get to replace Conan on Late Night then?"

    Jake Weingarten Gear-Coding Machine Operator

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