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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Court Rules Against Warrantless Wiretapping

A federal judge in Detroit ordered a halt to warrantless wiretapping. What do you think?
  • "Great—now we're going to have out-of-work surveillance experts flooding the job market. There go my chances at Radio Shack."

    Lloyd Greer Unemployed
  • "Damn activist judges. Who are they to check the powers of another branch of government?"

    Mary Bedford Systems Analyst
  • "What about the presidential right to the element of surprise? Isn't that guaranteed by the Constitution?"

    Michael Nostrand Spice Salesperson
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