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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Cuban Leadership Passed To Castro's Brother

Cuban leader Fidel Castro, 80, will for the first time temporarily hand over power to his brother, Raul, while he recovers from gastrointestinal surgery. What do you think?
  • "I'm used to the human rights violations, but I had hoped Castro was above nepotism."

    Leah Davis Telemarketer
  • "Funny how this 'surgery' happens to coincide with the finals of America's Got Talent. I'm just saying, keep an eye out for a 6'4" bearded man whose talent is smoking 8 cigars at the same time."

    Matt Ruben Image Consultant
  • "So I swam all the way over to America to avoid persecution just for the guy to die 16 years later? Nuts!"

    Julio Cruz Systems Analyst
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