Dennis Rodman Returns To North Korea

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Vol 49 Issue 36

Onion Sports’ NFL Week One Picks

OSN shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in this weekend’s NFL Week One games: Ravens at Broncos OSN’s Lock Of The Week: Broncos — The Broncos will win this game in a 49-27 rout o...

Nicole Walden

A memorial service will be held Friday for Nicole Walden, the world’s first “Nikki,” who passed away peacefully yesterday at 92.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Good Times

Man Considers Nodding Approvingly After Friend’s Drink Purchase

MEQUON, WI—Seeking to convey his endorsement of his acquaintance's selection at local bar Coney's Draft House this evening, area man Thomas Dodge told reporters that he was considering nodding approvingly at his friend’s alcoholic beverage pur...

Technology

Technology Unfortunately Allows Distant Friends To Reconnect

WAYNE, PA—Providing them the tools necessary to bridge a gap that both individuals say they were more than willing to maintain indefinitely, sources confirmed Monday that the advent of modern technology has unfortunately allowed distant friends Mere...

Dennis Rodman Returns To North Korea

Dennis Rodman Returns To North Korea Six months after he visited on a goodwill tour with the Harlem Globetrotters, former NBA star Dennis Rodman is back in North Korea to “just have a good time” with his “friend” Kim Jong-un, the isolated country’s 29-year-old leader. What do you think?

  • “Shouldn’t we be more focused on Syria? Assad could use a buddy, too.”

    Jeremy Yu
    Wire Bender
  • “I like their friendship. It reminds me of when a duck and a cat become pals.”

    Hank Jarvis
    Tapioca Processor
  • “Have fun, you two!”

    Ellen Lyon
    Embroiderer
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