adBlockCheck

Recent News

‘The Princess Bride’ By The Numbers

‘The Princess Bride’ was released 30 years ago today, and it has since become a classic beloved by people of all ages. ‘The Onion’ looks back at ‘The Princess Bride’ 30 years later.

National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.
End Of Section
  • More News

Dogs Originated In Middle East

Using genetic markers, researchers at the University of California, Los Angeles, have discovered that dogs were likely first domesticated from wolves in the Middle East. What do you think?

  • "Maybe yours was, but mine sure as hell came from the ol’ U S of A."

    Martin Drozd Beam Warper
  • "Yes, but dogs were first turned into surrogate children in the Western Hemisphere during the mid-20th century."

    Laura Ivins Holter Technician
  • "Now all I have to do is fill in about 20,000 years of genealogy and I'll have a complete pedigree for my boxer, Raymond."

    Bill Coyne Quirk Sander

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close