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How Amazon Plans To Expand

After years of rapid growth and expansion into new industries, Amazon recently announced that it would be opening a second headquarters outside of Seattle. Here are Amazon’s plans for continued growth.

Report: Americans Now Get 44% Of Their Exercise From Licking

WASHINGTON—Saying the practice accounted for a sizable portion of the nation’s physical activity on any given day, a new report published Tuesday by researchers at the National Institutes of Health revealed that Americans currently get 44 percent of their exercise from licking things.

‘Lost Dog’ Poster Really Tooting Dog’s Horn

BROOKLYN, NY—Claiming the flyer could really stand to tone it down a little, sources said a lost dog poster that began appearing in Brooklyn’s Fort Greene neighborhood Tuesday was really tooting the dog’s horn.
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D.O.J. Investigates Self

The Justice Department is opening a probe to investigate its own use of wiretapping and warrantless surveillance. What do you think?
  • "Is that wiretapping stuff still going on? I thought that was last year. I remember I was so outraged about that."

    Jill Beckett Bellhop
  • "Gonzalez is taking this very seriously. He personally promoted top- notch D.O.J. janitor Phil Nugs to Inspector General just to lead this probe."

    Stephen Varney Systems Analyst
  • "There's a good chance they'll catch themselves red-handed here."

    Brendon Gaines Projectionist

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