Donna Summer Dead

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Disney Unveils First Virgin Princess

LOS ANGELES—In an effort to better reflect the diverse backgrounds and experiences of their audience, Disney officials this week introduced Lily of Hazelberry, the company’s first virgin princess.
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FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer World Cup In United States

Global Soccer Tournament To Kick Off In America Later This Afternoon

ZURICH—After the Justice Department indicted numerous executives from world soccer’s governing body on charges of corruption and bribery, frantic and visibly nervous officials from FIFA held an impromptu press conference Wednesday to announce that the United States has been selected to host this summer’s 2015 World Cup.

Donna Summer Dead

Donna Summer, singer of such disco anthems as "Last Dance" and "Love To Love You Baby," died at the age of 63. What do you think?

  • “I'd prefer being alone with my thoughts. I will post a statement later. I'm triangulating for the sweet spot of heartfelt and most-retweetable.”

    Rebecca Chauvin
    Unemployed
  • "At least I got to see her perform live once. I just wished I hadn't booed the entire time now."

    Lee McCormick
    Hands Assembler
  • “Now it's all up to Robin Gibb to keep living.”

    Miles Nero
    Systems Analyst
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