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Doritos Creator Dies

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Entire Broncos Organization Announces Retirement After Super Bowl Win

‘There’s Nothing Better Than Going Out On Top,’ Says Every Denver Player, Coach, Executive, Trainer, Office Administrator, Janitor

SANTA CLARA, CA—Following the team’s 24-10 victory over the Carolina Panthers in Super Bowl 50, every single member of the Denver Broncos organization officially announced their retirement Sunday.

Family, Friends Concerned After Peyton Manning Wanders Away From Pocket

SANTA CLARA, CA—Admitting to being “worried sick” after realizing he had suddenly disappeared in the middle of a play, family and friends of Peyton Manning grew incredibly concerned Sunday after the veteran Denver Broncos quarterback wandered away from the pocket during the first quarter of Super Bowl 50, sources confirmed.
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Holidays

Doritos Creator Dies

Arch West, the Frito-Lay marketing executive credited with inventing the Dorito snack chip, died at 97. What do you think?

  • "Dammit. It’s getting harder and harder by the day for a girl to snare a snack pioneer."

    Darcy Roach
    Brush Finisher
  • “To make it to 97 I’m guessing he erred more on the side of Doritos-creating than Doritos-consuming.”

    Torrens
    Layaway Clerk
  • "I bet that guy's car was a complete mess all the time."

    Pete Decoutere
    Systems Analyst

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