'Duke Nukem Forever' Finally Released

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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'Duke Nukem Forever' Finally Released

After more than 13 years in development, the latest installment in the Duke Nukem series of first-person shooter video games was released Tuesday. What do you think?

  • "Susan is not a fan. Susan is more into third-person shooters. If you catch Susan's drift."

    Susan Corrigan
    Systems Analyst
  • "Looks like I can tell my grandfather he can finally die now."

    Bob Farmer
    Bag Sewer
  • "In middle school I was so excited at the promise of seeing three-dimensional boobs, but now that I'm grown up, I can get that by playing Grand Theft Auto."

    Craig Pistel
    Leader Tier