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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Fantasy Sports

Little League Pitcher Just Getting Fucking Shelled

RED BANK, NJ—After watching the 11-year-old give up the fourth straight double that inning, sources confirmed Sunday afternoon that local Little League pitcher Dustin Bauer is getting absolutely fucking shelled out there.

Originality

E. Coli At Taco Bell

At least 65 people in New York and New Jersey have fallen ill after eating at Taco Bell restaurants. What do you think?
  • "This will make me think twice about eating at the most disgusting fast-food chain in America."

    Liam O'Shaunessy
    Train Conductor
  • "It's a good thing the outbreak appears to be over. If I don't eat a Gordita Supreme at least once a day, I get pretty antsy."

    Greg Staples
    Mail Center Clerk
  • "Perhaps those customers actually ordered E. Coli. The menus can be so confusing at foreign restaurants."

    Emily Toomey
    Point Tucker
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