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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Early Marijuana Use Increases Psychosis Risk

A study by the Queensland Brain Institute in Australia showed that young adults who had smoked marijuana for at least six years were twice as likely to suffer delusions, hallucinations, or psychotic episodes. What do you think?

  • "That's a shame. I was really hoping marijuana would be the one mind-altering drug that you could chronically use for several years without it seriously altering your mind."

    Jessica Brodsky Systems Analyst
  • "To really prove this theory, they need to do a comparable study where they give free pot for six years to people on the 1200 block of East Burleigh in Milwaukee."

    Pete Alexander Aligning Checker
  • "Yeah, but you don't hear any of those stoners complaining, do you? I mean, have you ever heard a complaining stoner? Is that something that even exists? A complaining stoner, I'm talking about. Because if stoners don't do one thing, it is not not complaining."

    George Ludovico Cooper
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