Earth-like Planet Discovered

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Vol 43 Issue 18

Wal-Mart Fortune Left To Charity

The death of the Wal-Mart founder's widow, Helen Walton, is slated to become a $16.4 billion windfall for The Walton Family Foundation, a charitable...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Good Times

Man Considers Nodding Approvingly After Friend’s Drink Purchase

MEQUON, WI—Seeking to convey his endorsement of his acquaintance's selection at local bar Coney's Draft House this evening, area man Thomas Dodge told reporters that he was considering nodding approvingly at his friend’s alcoholic beverage pur...

Earth-like Planet Discovered

Scientists have discovered an Earth-like planet orbiting a red dwarf star 20 light-years away. What do you think?
  • "If it's Earth-like, then it's probably near destruction and of no use to us."

    Randy Kirkland
    Cantor
  • "How Earth-like? 'Temperate and able to sustain life' Earth-like or 'completely overrun with self-absorbed assholes' Earth-like?"

    Eirc Steinway
    Social Worker
  • "Did scientists find any tall, single men on that Earth? I've pretty much exhausted my possibilities here."

    Melody Thorsen
    Tour Guide
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