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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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East Coast Braces For Blizzard

Thousands of flights have been canceled and several government agencies have shuttered in anticipation of a massive snowstorm making its way to the East Coast, a blizzard that could affect as many as 75 million people in a dozen states. What do you think?

  • “Typical East Coast media bias. It snowed here in Columbus last night, but I didn’t see any news trucks.”

    Tony Gascoyne Noise Meterman
  • “How could the promise of eating beefaroni by candlelight worry anyone?”

    Darryl Jeffers Mustache Barber
  • “Great. The first time in my life a journalist wants to interview me, and it’s to talk about the fucking weather.”

    Monica Penderton Nun Biographer

More from this section

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

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