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Ebert and Roeper Leaving 'Ebert and Roeper'

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Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
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Ebert and Roeper Leaving 'Ebert and Roeper'

Film critic Roger Ebert and Chicago Sun-Times columnist Richard Roeper have opted not to renew their contract with Disney, thereby ending their show after eight years together. What do you think?
  • "And thus the sun sets on the golden era of opposable-digit-based art criticism."

    Rebecca Roos Upholsterer
  • "Ebert said the elephant acting like a dog in George Of The Jungle 'blindsided him with laughter.' Now how do you feel about the news?"

    Sam Ryder Filing Clerk
  • "This is going to be like navigating a canal without a gondola driver. Whoa, isn't that a great metaphor? Should I be a movie critic?"

    Chris Lowry Systems Analyst

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