Election Madness

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Where Your Political Donation Goes

With over $1 billion spent in the 2016 presidential race alone, campaign donations continue to cause much controversy and even confusion for their role in shaping politics. Here is a step-by-step guide to how the average American’s political donation travels through a campaign

Fact-Checking The Third Presidential Debate

Presidential nominees Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump sparred over subjects including foreign policy, the economy, and their fitness to hold the nation’s highest office in the final debate Wednesday. The Onion examines the validity of their assertions

Intergalactic Law Enforcement Officers Place Energy Shackles On Hillary Clinton

PARADISE, NV—Materializing through a dimensional portal in front of a stunned audience at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, intergalactic law enforcement officers reportedly appeared onstage during Wednesday night’s presidential debate and placed a pair of glowing blue energy shackles on Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton.

Trump Complains Entire Personality Rigged Against Him

WEST PALM BEACH, FL—Responding to his flagging poll numbers and a string of newspaper editorials and cable news pundits questioning his fitness to lead, Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump reportedly complained to a rally crowd Thursday that for the entirety of this race, his personality has been rigged against him.

Fact-Checking The Second Presidential Debate

Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton and Republican nominee Donald Trump discussed topics including national security, taxes, and their ongoing personal scandals in a contentious town hall presidential debate Sunday. The Onion evaluates the truthfulness of their claims

Trump Vomits Immediately After Seeing Everyday Americans Up Close

ST. LOUIS—His face turning deathly pale and beads of cold sweat forming on his brow as he took his seat for the town hall forum at Washington University, Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump reportedly vomited directly onto the debate stage Sunday night upon viewing everyday Americans up close.
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Election Madness

With Florida's results in doubt, several other states mulling recounts, and both Bush and Gore threatening legal action, the winner of the Nov. 7 presidential election has yet to be determined. What do you think?
  • "Gore should concede and let Bush have the presidency. After all, he's truly earned it."

    Len Ruffin Meat Packer
  • "I just hope they do a revote in my district. I'm pretty sure I accidentally voted for Leo Koepke for county clerk instead of Barb Shultz."

    Elaine Pasqua Homemaker
  • "The only clear mandate I see emerging from this election is that elderly Palm Beach Jews want an end to abortion and affirmative action."

    Bethany Aldrete Teacher
  • "Man, that Doris Kearns Goodwin must be wetting her pants over this."

    Donald Youmans Chiropractor
  • "This has been an incredibly difficult time for me, not knowing whether to invest in Solarcorp or GloboPetrochemical."

    Andrew Deshaies Systems Analyst
  • "See, now this is why I don't vote."

    Patrick Bosio Auto Mechanic


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