Euro Crisis Hits Rock

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Vol 47 Issue 49

Coach Secretly Turned On By Illegal Formation

TAMPA BAY, FL—Buccaneers quarterbacks coach Alex Van Pelt admitted to reporters Saturday that even though he knows it's wrong and "very, very naughty," he secretly gets aroused when he sees a team line up in an illegal formation.

Who Is Romney Today?

Critics have long complained that instead of sticking to strong positions on issues such as immigration, federal spending, and health care reform, Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney has routinely changed his stance to appeal to voters. Here...
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Euro Crisis Hits Rock

Some rock bands, including the Red Hot Chili Peppers and Metallica, have changed the dates of their tours to ensure payment in the event the euro collapses. What do you think?

  • “Those guys have enough money. I’m sure traditional gifts like wooden shoes or cheese wheels would mean more to them anyhow."

    Kathleen Patterson
    Systems Analyst
  • "God, I hope this doesn't mean they're going to be in the U.S. all summer."

    Marty Scipio
    Hook Tender
  • "Well, it's good at least to hear that Metallica's still out there doing what they love most: ensuring they get their goddamn money."

    Rick Gonsales
    Unemployed
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