Facebook Pays $1 Billion For Instagram

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Vol 48 Issue 15

April 17

Sandalwood Circle residents are advised that the Baumgartners will be having pretty loud sex this Tuesday shortly after 9 p.m.

Glass Ceiling Business

"All the feminist movement needed to do was bring on someone who had the balls to do something about this glass ceiling business." - Peter "Buck" McGowan, chief of the worldwide initiative for women's rights
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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  • The Onion’s Guide To Beach Etiquette

    The arrival of summer means that the nation’s beaches will soon be crowded with swimmers, tanners, surfers, and more, so it’s important for everyone to be conscious of each other’s space and needs. Here are some etiquette tips to ensure that everyone has a safe and relaxing time at the beach:

Facebook Pays $1 Billion For Instagram

In advance of its initial public offering, Facebook has purchased the two-year-old photo-sharing website Instagram. What do you think?

  • "And I thought there was nothing that could make the Facebook IPO more exciting."

    Ann Barnett
    Light Technician
  • "Great, another app I won’t have a chance to try because its acquisition by Facebook makes it too passé."

    Albert Moore
    Systems Analyst
  • "I wish I could make big business decisions like that. All I can buy for my company is stupid little cupcakes. And I already ate those."

    Michael Cubiero
    Bag Liner
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