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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Farmers Planting Less Corn

Despite a record demand for corn caused in part by ethanol fuel, American farmers are expected to plant 8 percent less corn in 2008 than they did last year. What do you think?
  • "I'm sorry; people have been putting corn in their cars? Did I fall asleep and wake up 500 years in the past?"

    Dawn Patterson Personal Trainer
  • "I'm surprised how quickly the farmers were able to master OPEC-style supply and demand manipulation."

    Sam Reese Systems Analyst
  • "I knew the day would come when a corndog would lend me an air of affluence."

    Larry Kemmis Secretary
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