FBI Loses Laptops And Guns

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Vol 43 Issue 07

Drunk Driver In The Zone

STOUGHTON, WI—Alcoholic and car owner Jim Torkleson attributes his "best-ever" 11-mile, 0.14 blood-alcohol-content drunken drive home from...

John Amaechi Comes Out As Former NBA Player

STOCKPORT, ENGLAND—British homosexual John Amaechi sent shockwaves throughout the sporting world last week when he announced, much to the surprise of his family and friends—in addition to NBA players and fans—that he lived a...
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FBI Loses Laptops And Guns

According to a recent report, 160 laptops have been lost or stolen from the FBI, as well as 160 weapons. What do you think?
  • "The fact that the same exact number of guns and laptops are missing is exactly why the FBI should never have fitted their computers with holsters."

    Wanda Kelley
    Systems Analyst
  • "It must be humbling for the FBI to know they have worse security than a CompUSA."

    Rodrigo Gutierrez
    Dance Instructor
  • "Man, I know all about that. I can't tell you how many times I've left my gun or laptop on the back of a toilet tank or in an ATM vestibule."

    Herman Bonello
    Security Guard
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