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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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FCC Mandates Text-To-911 Emergency Service

The FCC has established a deadline for all cellular providers to offer services that allow users to text messages to 911 emergency dispatchers, which allows those in need to get help when it's too dangerous to talk or when they are unable to speak. What do you think?

  • "Anyone can text, but nothing beats the sincerity of a handwritten letter."

    Candace Weil Fabric Folder
  • "Meanwhile, all my tweets to @911 are going completely ignored."

    Bill Rodriguez Chair Assembler
  • "This is going to lead to a disturbing set of emojis."

    Dan DeGregory Microwave Tester
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