adBlockCheck

Recent News

Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.
End Of Section
  • More News

FDA Orders Warning Labels On Tanning Beds

The FDA has moved tanning beds from low-risk to a moderate-risk classification and will require the beds to have warning labels stating they should not be used by minors, citing data showing that 2 million teens, including 3 in 10 suburban high school girls, use tanning beds each year. What do you think?

  • “Why not? It worked for cigarettes.”

    Patrick Gilpin IT Specialist
  • “If anything’s going to convince a teenager they’re not actually invincible, it’s pointing out a behavior risk considered moderate.”

    Clara Thorne Café Manager
  • “Did the study have any other data about what high school girls like?”

    Nick Abbott Airport Shuttle Driver
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close