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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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FDA Proposes Altering Nutrition Labels

The FDA is proposing significant changes to nutrition labels on food packaging, such as emphasizing calorie count by visually enlarging that number and recalculating portion sizes to more accurately reflect how much people eat in one serving. What do you think?

  • “Wouldn’t it be easier if they just added an exclamation mark after the number of calories?”

    Julia Gerard Driving Instructor
  • “Ooh, if they change the serving portions from three down to one, that’ll leave extra room for dessert.”

    Michael Barnett Unemployed
  • “Perfect. If I see the calorie count in bigger type, I’ll definitely avoid all the food I can’t stop eating.”

    Gene Yester Script Supervisor
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