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Woman Conducting Ongoing Scientific Experiment On Own Skin

DULUTH, MN—Noting her methodic applications of various chemical agents in carefully controlled combinations, sources confirmed Wednesday that local woman Sara Holloway has been carrying out an open-ended scientific experiment on her own skin.

Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Female Professors Rated Lower By Students

A French university found that students rated male professors higher than female ones even when the students performed worse in the male instructor’s class, highlighting both gender biases in education and the failure of evaluations to measure effective teaching. What do you think?

  • “If they teach first period, they have it coming.”

    Manny Tellaga Tone Modulator
  • “Man, I was hoping this latest study on innate gender biases would be full of good news.”

    Jane Samuels Zoology Blogger
  • “It’s pretty bitchy of those researchers to point this out.”

    Erik Wickert Statistics Quantifier
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