Fewer Emergency Rooms As Need Increases

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Vol 47 Issue 21

Restaurant That Never Has Customers Celebrates Fifth Weird Year

CHICAGO—The Royale restaurant near Rogers Park commemorated its fifth weird year of business Monday the same way it celebrated its opening: with a vague attempt to attract customers by stringing brightly colored plastic flags from the mysterious eatery's storefront to a nearby utility pole.

Al-Qaeda's New Leadership

Following Osama bin Laden's death, the Egyptian-born Saif al-Adel has reportedly been named interim leader of al-Qaeda.

Smallpox Destruction Delayed

The World Health Organization has delayed until 2014 its decision on setting a timetable for the destruction of its storehouse of the smallpox virus.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Fewer Emergency Rooms As Need Increases

According to a study published in The Journal Of The American Medical Association, the number of non-rural emergency rooms fell 27 percent even as ER visits nationwide rose 35 percent. What do you think?

  • “The upshot is that if the discrepancy persists long enough, we’ll have the perfect number of emergency rooms for everyone who hasn’t died.”

    Carol Stengler
    Systems Analyst
  • “But where are all the ambulances going to go?”

    Jim Harris
    Weight-Loss Camp Inspector
  • "Well, that doesn't sound good. Say, has anyone thought of trying to reform medical care in the United States?"

    Fred Butler
    Registrar
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