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First Transgender Person Nominated For Emmy

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360 Tour: Inside The RNC

The Onion invites you to explore our view from the floor of the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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First Transgender Person Nominated For Emmy

Nominated in the “Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series” category for her role on the Netflix series Orange Is The New Black, Laverne Cox is the first transgender individual ever to be considered for an Emmy, a distinction that comes on the heels of her appearance on the cover of Time magazine, another milestone for a transgender person. What do you think?

  • “This seems like a pretty low-pressure opportunity to prove how open-minded I am by saying ‘Congratulations!’”

    Doug Means Data Crammer
  • “Yet another rollercoaster of excitement that comes with ‘Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series’ nominations.”

    Tad Kellogg Zodiac Killer
  • “This sure makes the Golden Globes look like a bunch of transphobic bigots.”

    Victoria Trimble Unlicensed Pilot

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