Florida Evicts Bridge-Dwelling Sex Offenders

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Florida Evicts Bridge-Dwelling Sex Offenders

The state of Florida is dissuading sex offenders from continuing to live under a bridge, despite their claims that existing ordinances prevent them from living elsewhere. What do you think?
  • "I hope all this talk of sex offenders doesn't tarnish the squeaky-clean image of the common bridge-dweller."

    Duncan Garfield
    Pizza Cook
  • "I know that sometimes it's difficult to have sympathy for sex offenders, but just pretend for a minute that one of them was your father."

    Alex Gladstone
    Nail Salon Worker
  • "This is an outrage. My children drive over that bridge!"

    Mallory Ryan
    Marketing Consultant