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Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Food Allergies Cost U.S. $25 Billion A Year

New research shows that food allergies among the nation’s children—including allergies to nuts, wheat, dairy, and other foods, which affect 8 percent of all U.S. kids—cost American families an estimated $24.8 billion a year in medical expenses, allergen-free foods, special child care, and lost productivity. What do you think?

  • “Personally, I prefer my son’s puffed-up allergic face to his normal one.”

    Sandra Dessisso Sail Cutter
  • “There’s nothing more infuriating than accommodating a child’s specific needs.”

    Emil Harmon Hunting Guide
  • “A life without peanuts is no life at all.”

    Ray Heinrichs Unemployed

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