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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.

Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.
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'Game Of Thrones' Season 3 Premieres To Strong Ratings

The popular HBO fantasy drama Game of Thrones, based on the series of best-selling novels by George R.R. Martin, returned to television last night, continuing the struggle between the Lannisters and the Starks. What do you think?

  • “Oh, good. I hope it’s still taking place in a fictional world.”

    Marshall Littleton Art Therapist
  • “Yeah, suddenly now everyone’s such a huge fan. Well, guess what, I’ve been watching Thrones since the very first minute of the third episode of season two.”

    Colin Franchett Tubing Assembler
  • “Aw, I like it when shows do well.”

    Lizbeth Vick Submersible Pilot

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