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Gates To Leave Microsoft

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Obama Resigns From Presidency After Michelle Lands Dream Job In Seattle

‘It’s Time I Made Some Sacrifices For This Family,’ Reports President

WASHINGTON—Saying his wife of 24 years had already sacrificed so much for the sake of his career and that it was time to return the favor, Barack Obama announced Wednesday his resignation as president of the United States of America, effective immediately, following news that Michelle Obama had landed her dream job in Seattle.

High School Nurse Getting Pretty Good At Spotting Morning Sickness

FAIRFIELD, ME―Having seen more students than she can remember come into her office with complaints of nausea and vomiting over the years, Fairfield High School nurse Sarah Bromti told reporters Wednesday she’s getting to the point where she can identify morning sickness without much trouble.
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Gates To Leave Microsoft

Bill Gates announced that he will be giving up his duties in the day-to-day operations of Microsoft in 2008. What do you think?
  • "This will certainly give him more time to tighten his tyrannical monopoly on philanthropy."

    Alex Martinelli
    Sous Chef
  • "It was only a matter of time before the head of Microsoft crashed."

    Diane Wheedon
    Systems Analyst
  • "Now maybe he can finally buy one of those new black Dual-Core MacBooks without everyone crawling up his ass."

    Rob Bernstein
    Exterminator

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