Gay Marriage Could Be Profitable

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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  • Father Apologizes For Taking Out Anger On Wrong Son

    ELIZABETH, NJ—Moments after losing his composure with an unwarranted emotional outburst, local father David Kessler reportedly apologized to his son Christopher Thursday for erroneously taking out his anger on him and not his older brother Peter.


Gay Marriage Could Be Profitable

According to a report from the city's comptroller, New York City would stand to gain $142 million in the first three years of legalized gay marriage. What do you think?
  • "Why? Does buying a gay melon baller at Tiffany's cost more than buying a straight melon baller at Tiffany's?"

    Katharine Epperson
    Video Editor
  • "$142 million! Boy, they really know how to pull an old conservative Republican's heart-strings!"

    Andre Milstead
  • "The city needn't permit something so crass and immoral to raise money. May I suggest legalized gambling as an alternative?"

    Harris Charles
    Systems Analyst