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George Stephanopoulos Offered 'Good Morning America' Job

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Director Has Clear Vision Of How Studio Will Destroy Movie

LOS ANGELES—Saying he can already picture exactly what the finished cut will look like on the big screen, Hollywood film director Paul Stanton told reporters Wednesday he has a clear vision of how studio executives will totally destroy his upcoming movie.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 14, 2016

ARIES: Once the laughter dies down, the party favors are put away, and the monkeys led back inside their cages, you’ll finally be given a chance to explain your side of the story.

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.
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George Stephanopoulos Offered 'Good Morning America' Job

Former adviser to President Clinton and television host George Stephanopoulos has been offered a job as co-anchor of Good Morning America. What do you think?
  • "Just when you thought morning news shows couldn't have any more gravitas and dignity."

    Walt Swarts Systems Analyst
  • "I've been saying it for years: if you give George Stephanopoulos one day, sooner or later he's going to take the whole damn week."

    Ramona Eickelberg Unemployed
  • "Well, he does have all the credentials: He loves America, and he has nice teeth."

    Jonathan Hageman Telephone Lineman

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