adBlockCheck

Recent News

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
End Of Section
  • More News

Girl Sells Record 18,000 Boxes Of Girl Scout Cookies

Oklahoma middle school student Katie Francis broke the national Girl Scout cookie sales record by selling more than 18,000 boxes in seven weeks, attributing her success to asking everyone she sees to buy a box. What do you think?

  • “Always good to see a budding capitalist sociopath be a girl for a change.”

    Cameron Griffith Custodian
  • “She didn’t sell cookies. Cookies sell themselves.”

    Derek Rankin Health Inspector
  • “She’s going to be rich!”

    Taylor Finke Sales Representative
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close
settings