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Gitmo Prisoner Names Released

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Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.
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Gitmo Prisoner Names Released

The U.S government released the first list of detainees at the Guantanamo Bay prison last week, the most extensive accounting yet of the hundreds of people being held there. What do you think?
  • "With typical arrogance, the Pentagon didn't bother to inform the public who was sexiest."

    Blain Deutsch Meteorologist
  • "How embarrassing for them. I remember when Gigi Greenwood released that list of all the sophomore girls who had made out with Greg Curtis. I thought my life was over."

    George Shear Auctioneer
  • "At least now I know that my dear uncle Muhammed al-Qahtani is safe—kind of."

    Megan Ballard Radio Technican

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