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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:
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Glenn's Return To Space

Last Thursday, 36 years after becoming the first American in orbit, 77-year-old John Glenn made a triumphant return to space aboard the Space Shuttle Discovery. What do you think?
  • "This is a triumph, not just for the space program, but for all of America. It's too bad he's gonna die up there."

    Ellen Bolling Florist
  • "I was in favor of shooting Senator Glenn until I heard the 'into space' part."

    Craig Jensen Roofer
  • "Depending on the success of this mission, NASA may yet be convinced of my plan to rocket the elderly into the sun."

    Kerri Olson Teacher
  • "Didn't Tom Wolfe say you can't go back into space again?"

    Todd Daley Systems Analyst
  • "This time, Glenn's stammering wife had damn well better speak to LBJ like she's told."

    Mitch Hurd Geologist
  • "USA! USA! US–! What? This is a naked P.R. ploy by NASA with little scientific significance and, as such, is a disgrace to the space program and an affront to taxpayers, who must foot the $500 million bill? USA! USA! USA!"

    Paul Agganis Machinist
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