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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
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Google Asks NSA For Security Help

In light of recent hacking attacks, search engine leviathan Google has asked the National Security Agency for help securing its network. What do you think?
  • "And in return Google can help the NSA do something funny with its website logo each day."

    Kerrin Shea Systems Analyst
  • "Given the NSA's impressive record, they should be able to uncover valuable intelligence to help protect Google at least several months after a catastrophic attack on the company."

    Gareth Wembley Rim-Turning Finisher
  • "I'll come clean, before this becomes a huge problem. I confess to visiting the SuicideGirls website on my church's computer."

    Niles Ebbets Unemployed

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