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Man Knows Exactly Which Asshole Got Him Sick

SARATOGA SPRINGS, NY—Immediately realizing the genesis of the fever and sore throat that left him feeling like shit, 30-year-old local man Edward Mosley told reporters Tuesday that he knows exactly which asshole got him sick.

How Gerrymandering Works

The Supreme Court is considering a case regarding the partisan gerrymandering of districts in Wisconsin, which could change the way maps are drawn across the country. Here is a step-by-step guide to how Gerrymandering works.
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GOP To Spend $10 Million Reaching Out To Minorities

Following an “autopsy” of the party’s defeat in last year’s presidential election, the Republican National Committee earmarked $10 million to bring the party’s message to African-Americans, Hispanics, and Asian-Americans in cities throughout the country. What do you think?

  • “I’m not sure I like the idea of political groups spending money to influence election outcomes.”

    Georgina Federman Needle Polisher
  • “The best ideas always come out of autopsies.”

    Shane Puluti Hair Sample Matcher
  • “Yeah, 20 million stress balls that say ‘GOP Hearts Colored People’ ought to do it.”

    Huey Rose University Dean

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