Recent News

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.

Report: Grandpa Just Walks Like That Now

CULVER CITY, CA—According to family sources, the prominent limp displayed by local grandpa Marvin Adelstein on Tuesday is indicative of the fact that he just walks like that now.
End Of Section
  • More News

Governor Declares April ‘Confederate Heritage Month’

Mississippi governor Phil Bryant has submitted a proposal to make April “Confederate Heritage Month” in order to “reflect upon our nation’s past” and “gain insight from our mistakes and successes.” What do you think?

  • “I love hearing news about Mississippi!”

    Henry Salter Basketball Texturer
  • “For too long we have failed to honor those brave souls who paid the ultimate price so that others couldn’t be free.”

    Randy Tull Synopsis Condenser
  • “But I already put all my Confederate flags away for the season.”

    Alice Tenney Agricultural Clerk
More Videos


More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.