Granite Countertops May Contain Uranium

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Vol 44 Issue 34

Bigfoot Corpse A Fraud

Members of Searching For Bigfoot, Inc. said they had been tricked into buying a fake sasquatch body from an ex-policeman. What do you think?
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Granite Countertops May Contain Uranium

Many homeowners are having to remove their new countertops because the granite in them has been found to emit hazardous levels of radon. What do you think?
  • "I wondered why my Kenmore under-cupboard Geiger counter was going crazy."

    Sharon Kypke
    Horse Trainer
  • "Get rid of my gorgeous granite countertops just because of some measly radiation emissions? I don't think so. From now on, it's daily potassium iodide tablets for me and my family."

    Dick Jefferts
    Systems Analyst
  • "It's really the kids I feel sorry for. Those spoiled, rotten kids."

    Raul Parsons
    Security Guard
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