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360 Tour: Inside The RNC

The Onion invites you to explore our view from the floor of the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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GSA Under Fire

The General Services Administration, a relatively obscure federal government office, is under congressional scrutiny for spending more than $800,000 at a Las Vegas conference in 2010. What do you think?

  • "What a disgrace. Any properly run government agency should be able to blow through way more money than that in Vegas."

    David Tappert Automobile Upholsterer
  • "It's easy to criticize, but do you have any idea how much decent lanyards cost these days?"

    Bruce Guttridge Pellet-Mill Operator
  • "Sometimes government bureaucrats are corrupt or incompetent. Let's use this argument to completely abolish Medicare and Social Security."

    Dorothy Carey Frame Bander

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