Guantánamo Closure Delayed

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Vol 45 Issue 21

Archie To Choose Betty Or Veronica

After nearly 68 years, a grown-up Archie Andrews will ask either Betty or Veronica for her hand in marriage in an upcoming issue of his eponymous...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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  • Sports Drink Company Putting First Advertisement On Moon

    Japanese pharmaceutical company Otsuka has announced plans to put their sports drink Pocari Sweat on the moon in a specially equipped container bearing their logo, which, if successful, would be the first time a commercial product has been flown to the mo...

Guantánamo Closure Delayed

By a margin of 90-6, the Senate voted down funding to relocate the 240 inmates being held at Guantánamo Bay to facilities on American soil. What do you think?
  • "Maybe if we leave it open just one more week, we'll find out if they did it."

    Martha DePrima
    Systems Analyst
  • "You don't close a detention camp. You make it bigger and spikier."

    Ulrich Schuknecht
    Unemployed
  • "What a relief. Next to death and divorce, moving is the most painful thing in the world."

    Dan Everson
    Saddle Stitcher
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