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Patriotic Teen Fails Spanish

Jean Anne Whorton goes Beyond The Facts, talking to the high school sophomore who has become a conservative hero for refusing to learn his Spanish vocabulary.

‘The Princess Bride’ By The Numbers

‘The Princess Bride’ was released 30 years ago today, and it has since become a classic beloved by people of all ages. ‘The Onion’ looks back at ‘The Princess Bride’ 30 years later.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.
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Harry Potter Opens At No. 1

The seventh installment in the Harry Potter movie series, Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows: Part 1, opened No. 1 at the box office this weekend with a worldwide take of $330 million. What do you think?

  • "Wow. I can't say for sure, but I bet that's one of the best openings for the first part of a sixth sequel in movie history."

    Tony Pandolph Heavy Forger
  • "That's ridiculous. Those people could've spent that money chipping away at Ireland's national debt."

    Laurie McCarthy Systems Analyst
  • "I'm glad this franchise is finally wrapping up. My Hogwarts outfit from opening night of Sorcerer's Stone has become uncomfortably snug."

    Scott Murrell Unemployed

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