adBlockCheck

Recent News

Area Man Convinced He Could Have Been NFL Bust

DES MOINES, IA—Insisting that he possessed the physical and mental attributes to be one of the most disappointing draft picks of all time, local man Keith Parker, 34, was reportedly convinced Thursday that he could have been an NFL bust.

Nation’s Sanitation Workers Announce Everything Finally Clean

‘Please Try To Keep It This Way,’ Say Workers

WASHINGTON—After spending years sweeping and scrubbing across all 50 states, the nation’s sanitation workers announced Thursday that everything was finally clean and asked Americans if they could please keep it that way.
End Of Section
  • More News

HMOs And Birth Control

HMOs do not cover birth control, a fact that has angered many people in light of HMOs' coverage of Viagra. What do you think?
  • "If HMOs are made to cover birth control, what's next–diphtheria vaccinations?"

    William Ormond Lawyer
  • "If HMOs refuse to pay for birth control, they should at least make up for it by performing as many unnecessary Caesarian sections as possible."

    Lonnie Samms Graphic Designer
  • "My HMO didn't cover birth control. Now they cover Brianna, Michael, Ashley, Renee, Devon and Jasmine."

    Samantha Eccles Cashier
  • "That's okay if HMOs won't pay for birth control: Sheila says it totally makes you pork out."

    Alicia Donegan Student
  • "HMOs should stop paying for cancer treatment, as well. That just encourages people to get cancer."

    Chris Reiner Personal Trainer
  • "Birth control should not be covered because it's a lifestyle choice. Viagra, on the other hand, saves lives."

    Benjamin Schell Math Teacher

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close