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House Votes To Renew Ban On Plastic Guns

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360 Tour: Inside The RNC

The Onion invites you to explore our view from the floor of the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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House Votes To Renew Ban On Plastic Guns

The House of Representatives has voted to renew a longstanding ban on plastic firearms that don’t have enough metal to be detected by X-ray machines, though many have criticized the extension bill for not restricting 3D printing technology, which can produce plastic guns with removable metal parts. What do you think?

  • “I like when politicians can put aside petty differences to accomplish something that’s already law.”

    Christina Alker Chairlift Operator
  • “Sure, ‘plastic guns’—what else did they ban? Phasers and electro-rifles?”

    Joe Brennan Systems Analyst
  • “Just more evidence that congress is in the pocket of Big 3D.”

    Robert Gambon Geologist

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