adBlockCheck

Recent News

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

New EPA Chief Proposes 30% Cut In All Carbon-Based Organisms

WASHINGTON—Expressing confidence that the nation would meet the ambitious benchmarks by the end of Donald Trump’s presidential term, Scott Pruitt, the president-elect’s nominee for chief of the Environmental Protection Agency, said Thursday he would seek a 30 percent cut in all carbon-based organisms upon assuming office.
End Of Section
  • More News

Hugo Chávez Wins Third Term

Socialist Venezuelan president Hugo Chávez, who has served for nearly 14 years, was elected to his third six-year term Sunday with 54 percent of the vote, beating out former provincial governor Henrique Capriles Radonski. What do you think?

  • “Oh, no, not another six years of Chávez bringing America to its knees!”

    Vicente Alvarez Systems Analyst
  • “The Venezuelan people are going to be upset when they learn he’s a socialist.”

    Redmond Philpott Bicycle Messenger
  • “I wouldn’t want to be on Capriles’ campaign staff right about now. Or Chávez’s. What I’m saying is that I hate Venezuela and wouldn’t want to have a job that would require me to live there.”

    Myra Greenaway Window Washer

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close