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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Hurricane Could Strike RNC

Tropical Storm Isaac, which is currently gaining strength in the Atlantic Ocean, is expected to become a hurricane in the next several days and could strike Florida on Monday, when the Republican National Convention opens in Tampa. What do you think?

  • “They’ll be fine so long as the mayor sends the city’s sinners and sodomites up north to lure the storm’s wrath.”

    Allen Siguardsson Jockey
  • “I wouldn’t be surprised if this hurricane was just a plot concocted by the liberal mainstream meteorologists.”

    Jane Campion Leather Parts Matcher
  • “It’s going to be a big moment when Mitt stares up at the sky in the driving rain, screaming, ‘Nothing can stop me! Not even you, goddammit!’”

    Lynda Platkowski Systems Analyst
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